TV Addiction

Hi, my name is Sylvie and I am a TV addict.

Here you go, I’ve done the first step, admitting that I have an addiction and that in this area, my life doesn’t work. See TV is not like drugs, as everyone apparently watches TV — statistics say that on average, people watch 4 hours of TV per day.  I don’t know what my average time was, but I could binge watch TV series season after season, always in search of a new series that would just “hook me” and let me forget myself into the lives of these sexy characters. 

One could ask: Is it really an addiction? Well I don’t know, but I definitely had some level of compulsion to watch Grey’s Anatomy. See, the funny thing with that, is that I often watch TV as a reward, I feel tired: I want to watch TV! I feel sorry for myself: I want to watch TV! I worked hard: I deserve a bit of TV! I’m bored… hmm let’s watch some TV!  There was always an excuse to watch TV and it gave me a sensation of pleasure that was gone as soon as it came,never filling the empty vase of my being. 

So do I have a choice over watching TV? Where does the choice lie? I know it’s silly; it’s not alcohol,  or cigarettes, or junk food, it’s just TV right? It can’t be that harmful…? Or could it be? I have never read any study on the impact of TV on human cognition, but my gut feeling is that it wouldn’t be great news. Because If TV was good for me, then why does it come with a bitter taste of shame and self loathing after?Plum village monks are not supposed to watch TV, that tells you something! Monks vow to remove any things that could take them away from the present and any things that can lead to addiction, and thus they live a life of moderation and humbleness, addiction is alway about excess. 

I mean often we think of NOT doing something as a restriction but truly to NOT do something is to have FREEDOM FROM IT! We are so focused on the freedom TO that we forget the freedom FROM. Freedom from addictions, freedom from loneliness, these are the essence of the vows one takes as a monk. Because the principal to NOT do something, is not the absolutism of it but it is the harmony one finds within and without.  

When I watch TV, I feel that in that moment I don’t really have a choice. As a human I am prone to addictions - sugar, sex, tabaco, drugs, alcohol, etc. - and addictions in their essence remove choice and the sense of agency. Which leads me to question: how much agency does one have over our life? How can I train myself to have more agency over my state of being?

Watching TV often leaves me wanting more, indeed as the industry pours millions into creating powerful visual effects, dramatic narratives with attractive actresses and actors. I, the humble consumer, falls into their arms and abandons my free will. TV is powerful, it is the visual junk food for my mind, all these thousands of hours that I have washed my mind with all these images and catnip narratives. I have given them what is the most precious: my attention . Now, armed with my laptop which is both my tool for work and distraction, I creates a seamless transition between both, making it easier  to give into my addiction. It really requires willpower to not conform and fall into the void. 

When I was a little girl I thought what was on TV was like real life! It actually took me a very, very long time to understand that it was not the case. This made my teenage dating life very problematic because I believed things were supposed to happen like in the movies! The unattainable guy pursues the low key girl, and eventually kisses her and happily ever after, yet it just never went that way. Illusions and more illusions. This is very alarming because suffering always comes from illusions. Wrong perception from reality, wrong perception of others, ourselves and the world. So that digital world which is NOT the real world is a trap, yet a very sweet one, leading us into a never ending maze of pleasures and dissatisfaction. TV and Social Media are businesses built on selling you beautiful illusions and there is nothing wise in dwelling in illusions because reality always catches you back. But if you practice being ever more present, then reality is sooo good!!! So I’m trading my TV for a meditation cushion, so I can claim again my free will, because addiction is an ultimate form of attachment.

I decided to un-plug so I could plug into the “real” world.